"YOLO? I don’t even know anymore, what that even mean though If you only live once why we keep doing the same shit. Back home where I come from we keep being born again and again and again. That’s why they invented karma" - M.I.A

 I heard this while listening to M.I.A's new album Matangi. It caught my attention right away and I heard every word so clearly. Not to say that "it spoke to me" or anything like that but that she was able to put into words thoughts I've had for a while.

The Y.O.L.O craze was a little weird. Was it an excuse for people to do stupid shit or a way for people to look at what they have, what they wanted, and the time they had to achieve it? Y.O.L.O could have been very empowering. When you finally realize that this is as good as it gets wouldn't you toss away all the pettiness of opinions, give little thought to possessions except those that are sustaining, and really embrace and appreciate what you have? No, it was just an excuse to party like you'll never die and love like you've never lost, blahblahblah.

Now the idea of karma is a little scarier, if you believe in that sort of thing. I don't think it's meant to be scary but it helps you take into account the actions of your "current" life since those deeds or undoings will affect your future lives. I feel like karma is for those who take comfort in the idea that your soul can live on and you get a sort of redo at life. It encourages people to take care of their lives and how it affects those around them. Or you don't learn your lesson in this life, fuck around, and end up a pauper in the streets of India.

To sum up my thoughts, throwing caution to the wind is ridiculous and selfish. Your decisions will always affect others no matter how insignificant or private. The decisions you make for yourself change something in you that will ultimately touch the lives of others.

A Social Experiment

I don't know why I call it that. It just sounds cool but I don't know if this really qualifies as a social experiment.

Recently I've noticed that my Facebook "friends" have littered the news feed with EVERY.SINGLE.EMOTION.THEY.POSSESS. And it's getting a little unnerving. I mean, how can you update your status about every single moment of your life? Sure, your life is probably great right now. Got a new job, new boyfriend, new place. Freedoms you've never experienced before, experiences you never thought you'd get to have. The possibilities are endless.

But... does EVERYONE have to know? I feel like what's shared on Facebook belongs in a goddamn diary. I get tired of every single waking moment of a person's life being displayed on something as accessible as a Facebook page. What is the appeal? Do you need the attention of all 694 of your "friends?" Are you hoping someone will "like" your status about sleeping in on a Saturday (which I thoroughly enjoyed by the way)?

So I decided to partake in this absurd ritual. I had also just watched an episode of Parks and Rec where Tom and Donna try to keep Ron "on the grid" which inspired me to push my mobile social presence to it's fullest potential.

From today forward I will be Tweeting, Instagraming, and Facebooking to my heart's content. This may go one for days, weeks, maybe even months! Depending on how bored I get with my own life. So join me! Indulge my every waking update. Or ignore it, that's cool too.

They can't all be winners

Let's talk about how tired I am of feminists.

My first impression of the feminist was a woman who wasn't submissive in any way. She was a fighter and never let silly things like a man telling her 'no' to bring her down. Feminists were the definition of a strong, independent woman who didn't need no man! Wonder Women personified this type of person. Lately, almost everything I've come across the labels itself "feminist" has come off as really bitchy. There's really no other word for it. It's articles upon articles of women complaining about things that really don't need to be different and it ends up sounding like they're digging for something to add to their "cause."

The latest example that pissed me off was an article from some random website I found by clicking on a link to a link. This article discussed 5 points why Bioshock Infinite is just another sexist game. For those of you who haven't played Bioshock Infinite, it is a game set in 1912 where you play a former Pinkerton agent by the name of Booker Dewitt, sent to the flying city of Columbia on a rescue mission. In 1912, things were a little different. Women weren't going around toting heavy firearms trying to rescue a helpless man trapped in a tower guarded by a giant metal bird. And the way the story came full circle would have never worked with a woman as the player's character. It's not that I don't think a woman can be a main, playable character, it's just that you have to have the right environment, atmosphere, or time period. It wouldn't have made sense to have Elizabeth as the main character. She was powerful enough on her own and was able to give some enemies a run for their money, even if she was in a more accessory, supportive role. The "5 points" this article put together, in my opinion, are not good points at all. I don't want to argue against each right now, I've already done that in my head, but I'll say that what the writer/blogger is pointing out either has nothing to do with the context of the game or they're pulling shit from so far up their ass, somebody else must be feeding it to them.

The way the article portrays it's "answers" to all the sexist problems with Bioshock Infinite would end up making it a completely different game. It is a fictional, fantasy game but it's still based on a real time in American history. Things were a certain way in that era and in order to preserve that in the game, the creators had to respect and embrace the bountiful racism and sexism that was rampant during that time. If they played the goddamn game maybe they would see how much Booker respects and is in awe of Elizabeth, and not even in a sexual or affectionate way, but just as a human being, so young and so full of promise.

Luxe just ain't for us

Man, I walked in here with the intention of getting something specific taken care of but I've totally spaced it. Oh well.

Life is good right now, I can't complain. Both my boyfriend and I were recently promoted (him more so than me but hey, he buys me pretty things sometimes), we moved into a better apartment full of goodies like a pool and gym, we're both fairly healthy, and the cat has been great. We have the money and time to spend on things we really enjoy like RiotFest this past weekend and then the Great American Beer Festival in a couple of weeks. Our (well mostly mine) plan to visit Claire in England is basically squared away. Joe just needs to get his passport and we will be good to go at the beginning of the year. I feel like all the things we've gotten to do and we are going to do, weren't things that I ever anticipated doing in my life, not without scraping for cash. But with how fortunate we are now, we can just sit back to pick and choose what next fun trip we want to go on or what concert we should attend.

I never imagined how *comfortable* I feel with my life right now. We don't have everything we want but that's okay. Besides, we still have time to attain those things. I just remember being in college and university with all the people around me either struggling or dreading the struggle of "real life." And here I am just kind of hanging out, fairly stress free. Is it my nonchalant attitude towards things? My careful planning to avoid financial pitfalls? Is it how frugal we always are even if we have more than enough for certain things?

When we moved to Denver, my dad did help us get settled by paying for the first and last months rent, upfront as required. I was only working at DSW and barely making enough to cover rent and utilities. I did have a fair amount of money saved up from working while I was in school and a little bit that summer so that helped keep the broke at bay until I found a full time job merely 7 months after we moved. I also didn't carry any kind of debt with me as I feel many of my friends and peers do.

We really are very lucky. I'm lucky to have what I have and to have who I have. I started this post with the intention of ranting about how boring life is right now in regards to my job. No really, my job is boring as fuck. I can do that shit with my eyes closed but I won't because I risk paper cuts. But after listing what I've got going for me right now, what I think of my work seems so trivial.

I'm pretty happy.

Words

Taking this quiz was difficult with all my coworkers talking around me. But on the other hand, I suppose I should have been working.

Merriam-Webster Vocabulary Quiz

So Close

I'm sitting in the little computer corner in our new apartment. It's cozy but not claustrophobic. Joe's beer stuff is over here too and I anticipate that most of his other stuff will end up in this corner as well. I'm not being cruel! Besides, he gets his own personal corner. Just kidding guys, I'm not that kind of girlfriend.

Our place is slowly coming together. There still a few boxes here and there but they're mostly filled with books and desk stuff so those items haven't quite made it to their respective homes. We took advantage of our larger kitchen and actually put pantry things and cookware into cupboards! Can you imagine!? Cupboards aren't something I thought I would take for granted, but after living in Dorset House with only enough cabinet space for dishes and glasses, I appreciate a good sized kitchen.

The living room space is a bit smaller than our last place but I think it works. We've got our couch about 5 ft from the TV which is perfect gaming space in my opinion. We've even got the trunk sitting between the two to act as a coffee table and footrest. Cheers to multipurpose furniture!

The bedroom is usually large in my opinion. They really could have used some of that space for the living room but what do I know. We have our desks and small TV in here along with the bed of course. There are also a couple of shelves that we used to use for the kitchen stuff but what with all those cupboards we have now, who needs them! The bathroom is also bigger than I feel any bathroom should be. Who is spending all their time in the bedroom or bathroom to the point that they need to have the space in order to function?? But I digress. The bathroom does include our washer and dryer so I suppose that's where part of the extra space comes in.

Then we've got the patio that overlooks the pretty little courtyard. I'm glad we decided to push for the "large" patio. It is really nice to be able to sit outside your apartment for some fresh air without actually having to leave. Cat enjoys the patio as well, until the dogs that occasionally frequent the courtyard come out.

I like it. This has been a good change.

Tooting my own horn

Hehe.. toot.

I just had a bunch of work dumped on me that I kind of anticipated but the workload far exceeded what I was really expecting. But, like the good worker bee that I am, I took it in stride. Once I realized my attitude towards the situation I sat back and thought, "I really am the shit." This company is lucky to have me because I don't crumble under the pressure of more work and just smile and nod when they tell me what I need to do. It's not that I always enjoy the work that's handed off to me but I understand it needs to be done and apparently I'm the best bet that it'll get done without a complaint. I don't shit bricks over it like I know some people would. They're perfectly capable of the task at hand but they still have to bitch about it while they do it.

And I'm alright.

Pumped

Right now I am listening to the illustrious Ke$ha. I joke with my friends that I think she's "sticky" but damned if her music isn't super catchy.

This kind of music gets me pumped and I really need a big push right now. There are plenty of things around me that I need to accomplish but for some reason I either can't get off my ass to get it done or I half ass my efforts. My biggest hesitation is applying to school. Every time I look at that application is seems so daunting even though I'm aching to get back into school and learn some shit. I'll collect my transcripts and see if today is the day I finally get that shit together.

Another hurdle I keep tripping over is with tracking my food consumption and exercise. At the beginning of each week I'm pretty gung-ho about tracking my calories and running around Cheeseman Park as often as my legs (and bitchy knee) will let me. But then random things get in the way and I sit around long enough to change my mind. It's not even anything productive that gets in the way. It's frustrating.

I can't believe it's already August. I feel like I've already wasted half the year.